Brotherly Love by vanishing
Author's Notes:
The June chapter for the "Finding What Is" series... the italicized bit is a flashback from my fic "In Memory".
...he turned to go and saw Halling standing in the doorway, watching him carefully.
"I was just leaving-"
"I know," Halling said gravely. "But she needs you here tonight." he glanced sadly past him at their sleeping friend, his forehead lined with concern. A second later he returned his gaze to Sheppard. "As long as you promise not to-"
"What? No, never!" he promised. He would never do anything like Halling was thinking; especially not to Teyla. "I'll sleep across the door." the smallest hint of a smile chased across Halling's face.
"I believe that she will appreciate that." He sounded almost amused, and John couldn't begin to guess why. But the man gave him no clue; he merely bowed his head and bid him goodnight, and left the tent.
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It had been one of the hardest days of John Sheppard's life. He hated to say it--- because as long as Teyla was happy, it should have been enough--- but seeing her happy with someone else that was killing him.
The day had started off normail enough; they'd gone on a routine mission to a new world; and the second that they'd stepped through the gate everyone reacted exactly as they should have,
McKay had taken only a second to pause and cautiously sniff the planet's air before spouting off his habitual litany of complaints that he seemed certain the team could not live without. Ronon--- as his runner's instincts demanded--- was on instant alert, wary of danger. And Teyla had paused and looked around, studying everything with abalanced mixture of caution and anticipation. He appreciated her perspective.
"Alright!" Sheppard cut McKay off. "The database didn't have a whole lot of information on this planet; but it said that the people are kinda skittish. So we're gonna be nice and calm and easy, alright?"
"Oh, nice and calm is my middle name!" Rodney said. John rolled his eyes.
"Just let me or Teyla do the talking, okay?" The insulted scientist immediately started to grumble, but John saw Teyla flash him an appreciative smile his way. He returned it, knowing that she liked that he trusted her; and that she secretly enjoyed saving him from making too mch of a fool out of himself. He loved that about her. Come to think of it, he loved everything about her.
He looked away before she could catch the look in his eyes. Yes they were friends, and they may have shared a kiss or two; but he knew that she didn't love him. They were friends, and would always remain simply friends. Best friends. but never anything more. He sighed, but started walking as if nothing was wrong; as if his heart wasn't breaking.
"You really should just tell her," Ronon murmured, coming up beside him. Sheppard frowned at him.
"Shut up!" he grumbled, stealing a quick glance at Teyla to make sure that she hadn't heard. But she was listening to something that McKay was saying, and didn't seem to have noticed.
"Seriously? What's so hard about three little words?" Sheppard fixed his eyes ahead, refusing to look at the Satedan.
"For one, even if you know that the feeling is mutual, those three little words are alwaysthe hardest ones to say. And also, this is..." he refused to look at her. "...you know who we're talking about. She's... herself, she's sweet, she's beautiful, she's..."
"Perfect?" Tonon supplied the word.
"Basically, yeah. And you don't just go and say that to a perfect person offhand like you want me to do. Besides, she'll feel bad and say what I want to hear, just so that I won't be upset."
"Have I ever told you how much of an idiot you are?" Ronon questioned.
"With increasing regularity." John shuddered. "Seriously, tell me what I have to do to get you off my case; get you pizza... beer... a thousand dead wraith?" Ronon didn't laugh, though he clearly wanted to.
"You either tell her..."
"Yeah, not happening."
"....or fight better." and a hand flew towards his head. He barely ducked out of the way in time.
"Knock it off!" he snapped. "What if we found a bunch of wraith and you were too busy whacking me to kill them?"
"Then your girlfriend would save us," Ronon muttered playfully.
"Ronon!" John wasn't in the mood for his friend's irritatingly persistent teasing.
"Now, boys..." Teyla cut in, John's raised voice giving her a reason to gently silence McKay's complaints. "Play nice."
"Oh, yes mother." John snapped crankily, instantly regretting taking his anger out on her. She raised an eyebrowat him.
"John..."
"Sorry. But don't yell at me; he started it!"
She turned to Ronon.
"Don't antagonize him, please. Our mission would pay for it now, and you will pay for it later."
"I'm sorry, mother," he mocked Sheppard's earlier comment, not looking sorry at all. But something in her eyes made him get serious again. Once he wiped that evil smirk off his face, Teyla turned to sedate McKay again. But her distraction only allowed Ronon to grin again and mouth something at Sheppard that he didn't bother to try and understand. Ignoring the Satedan, he focused his eyes ahead and thought that this was exactly how he knew that Teyla didn't love him the way that he loved her; she acted like their mother.
It wasn't long before they reached teh village, which fit the description in the database perfectly. The people were shy and skittish, but curious, trailing after the team like lost puppies.
Eventually, one of the bolder villagers--- who couldn't have been much older than twenty--- stepped up to them. Sheppard gave the teen what he hoped was a comforting, non-threatening smile.
"Hi," he said. To his surprise, the kid started to spout off what sounded like a lot of gibberish.
"What?" And the gibberish was repeated, no less understandable tan the first time.
"Teyla..." John began, turning in her direction to find her gone. He groaned.
"Where did she go?" he asked, not directing his question at anyone in particular.
"That way," Ronon gestured to their right. "Talking to... that guy." Sheppard followed his friend's pointing finger and saw Teyla, her forehead pressed to that of a tall and admittedly attractive--- by what John knew of women's standards--- man, and her arms wrapped tightly around his waist. Her back was almost completely turned to them, so he couldn't see her face; but something told him that she was crying.
He burned with jealousy.
"Excuse us for a minute..." he muttered to the confused teen, before heading towards his wayward team-mate. As he got closer, he heard her quite voice even above the noise of the crowd.
"...I can't believe it's really you..." Really who? Who WAS this guy that was hugging and holding the woman that he loved as if there was no one else in the world?
"Want to introduce us?" he questioned, with the minimum amount of respect required for speaking to Teyla. She jerked around, running a hand quickly under her eyes to hide the wetness. Yup. Definitely crying. Who was this guy that she loved him enough for the mere sight of him to make her cry? John's anger grew. She had never cried for him before.
"I'm sorry. Tayzon, this is my team..." she pointed to each of them as she said their names. Then she introduced them to her friend. "This is Tayzon Anachi."
"Hi," McKay said distrately. Ronon just grunted, but seemed to approve of her closeness tothe man.
"Pleasure," John lied; this was anything but. Teyla raised an eyebrow a his tone, but chose to ignore it.
"Tayzon is a very dear friend of mine," she explained to them. "But he was taken many years ago. I did not know that he had survived."
"I almost didn't," he admitted. "I would not have, of I had not intrigued the queen enough for her to let me live."
"How?" Ronon asked, interested.
"She found me... similar? to her people."
"How?" John asked, biting ff a comment about being an absolute low-life for abandoning his people. And he only managed to do that for Teyla's sake.
"He has my gift," Teyla explained, running her hand gentlyup the man's arm without seeming to realize it. "And I think that he learned to use it before I did. He used to hear the wraith speak." John's mind barely registered that; all he could focus on was her physical closeness to Tayzon.
"I was able to tell the queen everyting that her followers were thinking; and it made me unusual and useful as a spy against them, and especially against other hives. It was enough of a reason for her to keep me alive until I could escape."
"So what does that make you; a wraith worshipper?" John asked. This time Teyla's look could have killed him; but Tayzon seemed mildly annoyed, at the most.
"I pretended what I had to in order to survive; but I swear that I do not work for them now." He noticed Teyla's rage, and put a soothing hand on her arm. "It's alright, Shona. I would worry as well." She relaxed somewhat, but John had a feeling that it was merely so that she wouldn't make a scene in the middle of the village square. He was certain that he would hear about this later.
"When you did escape--- which I want to know how you did, by the way---why didn't you go back to Athos?" Tayzon smiled sadly at Rodney's question.
"I did," he said. "But all that I found was evidence of a culling."
"Ah." Rodney didn't say anything else; he knew as well as anyone else that John had caused the culling.
Things all went downhill from there. John had somehow been conned into bringing Tayzon back to Atlantis, and later to the mainland. Well, that wasn't completely true. He'd done it because Teyla had asked him to. He couldn't refuse her anything. But he was wishing that he had, because Tayzon was driving him crazy.
They'd introduced him to Elizabeth, and he'd given her the same sob story that he'd shared on the planet. John was sick of it. Elizabeth may have bough it, but he didn't. There was definitely something wrong about that guy. The way he kept looking at Teyla, their... physical closeness. Every time that they were near enough, she was in his arms, or he had his hand on her arm, or something.
Yes, he was jealous, he admitted. But it was righteous jealousy; he didn't want Teyla to end up with this guy who had abandoned her years ago. And it bothered him that she was welcoming him back with opened arms so quickly.
Tayzon had been given a full security and medical check, and soon after they had left for the mainland, where Sheppard had spent hours being ignored as the Athosians welcomed back their long lost kinsman. He wanted to throw up.
In honor of Tayzon's return, a feast had been prepared, but John barely tasted any of it. He couldn't take his eyes off of Teyla... who couldn't take her eyes off of Tayzon. He hated it.
Things had continued in much the same fashion for most of the night. But it was late now, and some of the Athosians were finally starting to drift off to bed. Sheppard. And Ronon and Rodney--- who had all gotten permission to stay the night--- were sitting alone by a fire, the Satedan and the scientist driving each other crazy. John was staring sulkily off towards a different fire; were Teyla sat with Tayzon and Halling, deep in conversation.
He saw them glance in his direction once, and a question seemed to pass between the three, before they looked away again. John bit back a moan.
"Hey," Ronon shoved him off-balance, diverting his attention. "You can at least pretend that you're happy for her." John frowned at him darkly.
"Aren't you the one who's always telling me that I'm in love with her?" he asked creankily. "Why would I be happy to see her with another guy?" Ronon's eyes widened.
"Are you serious?" he started to laugh; a sound that they rarely heard from him, which made eit that much more infuriation.
"What?" John snapped. Ronon just shook his head and laughed some more.
"I'm gonna let you figure this one out on your own, Sheppard." Still laughing, he got up and walked away in search of a late-night snack.
After a moment, Johnn realized that Rodney was sitting there, staring at him.
"What?"
"Is that seriously what you're upset about; you're worried that Tayzon is going to steal her from you?"
"Wouldn't you be?" It was a lame defense and he knew it. But he was running out of good ones.
"He can't steal her from you if you haven't claimed her," McKay informed him. "And you haven't. She has no idea that you love her."
"Oh, so the insightful McKay returns!" he spat sarcastically. "Why is it that yu only get that way when you want me to do something stupid?" ROdney frowned, insulted.
"The only stupid thing that you could do would be to do nothing," he informed him, before heading after Ronon and leaving John alone by the fire.
------------
The next morning dawned bright and warm, but John was unable to enjoy it. For one thing, he was still there. And that aside, Halling had put him to work.
He had agreed because he'd thought that it would get him away from Tayzon. No such luck. For once, he and Teyla were not joined at the hip; instead, the man had the nerve to follow him around! John threw himself into the tasks that he'd been given, hoping to distract himself from Tayzon's presence. It didn't work.
Around four o'clock in the afternoon, something snapped. It may have been the lack of Teyla's presence to make him behave, or it may have just been the heat of the day. But regardless of the reason, he lost control.
"What are you trying to do to me?" he demanded, dropping the tool that he'd been trying to fix and whirling on Tayzon. "And not just the whole following me around thing, either--- which is incredibly annoying, by the way--- but what are you trying to do to Teyla?!" Tayzon looked shocked.
"Excuse me?"
"You're practically throwing yourself at her; you're trying to take her away from us. But where have you been for the past few years, huh? You couldn't have survived on the hive for that long!"
"I tried-"
"And regardless of where you HAVE been, the point is that Teyla deserves better than someone who deserted her." As with Ronon the night before, Tayzon's eyes opened wide, and he laughed disbelievingly. Unlike Ronon, it was clear that he did not find any of this funny.
"That's what you think.. didn't she tell you anything?!" Sheppard was confused, but he channeled all that confusion into the desire to hit Tayzon as hard as he could. He watched with satisfaction as the man reeled back. But a cry shattered his victory.
"JOHN!" he cringed; she had seen what he'd done. He was dead.
To his surprise, she stormed past him and over to Tayzon, wrapping her arms around him and comforting HIM, the imposter! And somehow her total disregard for John standing there just made everything worse.
"What, you can't even get mad at me now?" she ignored his rant, so he continued as she herded Tayzon back towards the settlement. "What are you going to do now? Tale him back to your tent for a couple of hours like you did last night?" Teyla's head whipped around. "Comfort your boyfriend a little 'cuz he can't take a hit?!"
"How dare you even suggest-"
"Don't tell me that I'm wrong; I saw you take him into your tent last night!" Teyla's eyes were flaming with rage.
"You really have no idea who he even is, do you?"
"Bunkmate?" he bit out sarcastically, never even seeing her punches coming. In an instant, he was doubled over and tasting blood from a split lip.
"If you ever speak that way again..." but she was too angry to even finish. She turned away and returned with Tayzon to the settlement, leaving John alone. He watched until they were out of sight, then stormed through the village to the jumper. He refused to say a word to anyone, or even find Ronon and Rodney. He closed the hatch and relaxed in the pilot's seat. Not until the mainland was well out of sight did he radio Atlantis to send a jumper for the two.
"What about Teyla?" Elizabeth asked.
"I don't care if she comes back or not!" he told her. "As long as Tayzon isn't with her."
He reached the city in record time, parked the jumper, and immediately set off at a run towards one of the still deserted parts of the city, unable to be near anyone right now.
------------
John watched the sky darken into dusk. He let the cool breeze wash over him and tried not to think. There would be feelings that came with those thoughts, and the last thing he wanted was to feel.
No one bothered im while he was out there. He knew that no one knew what was going on with him, but they had talked to him while he was flying back and they knew that he was in a bad mood. No one wanted to get on his bad side.
He stood there for about an hour in the gathering dark, seething, knowing that no one would disturb him. Which was why he was startled when suddenly he heard her voice behind him.
"It is a long way back to the tower," he jumped at her soft voice, but didn't turn around.
"How'd you find me, then?"
"Because I know you, John Sheppard." For a long moment after that, they were silent. He heard her sigh. "You were wrong, John."
"I know!" he shouted. She sucked in a startled gasped, and he softened. "I know," he said again, very quietly. "I never should have said that you were sleeping with him; that's none of my business, you can do what you want-"
"John," she cut him off softly. "Tayzon is not my lover." John blinked, for a moment speechless.
"He's not?" he asked numbly.
"Do you remember how I introduced him?" she asked. He nodded slowly.
"Tayzon Anachi."
"Anachi is not his name," she explained. "It is an Athosian word that means brother." John swallowed hard.
"He's your brother?" he repeated, as suddenly all of the looks and gentle touching made sense as he realized it had not been done inappropriately.
"My cousin," she said. "But as close as a brother. I have much the same relationship with him that I do with Halling. They are my protectors." She paused, and John remembered an Athosian custom that he had heard of where a girl's closest friends were chosen to act like her brothers, if she had none. That must have been what had happened with Tayzon and Halling. He burned with shame to think of what he'd been suggesting. Now he knew why Ronon had been laughing at him.
"Last night," Teyla continued, "he slept at my door; like you did on... Easter. He did nothing wrong."
"I didn't know..." she sighed tiredly.
"So I gathered when you accused him. I had not realized that you did not know who he was to me."
"I'm sorry, Teyla. If I'd known, I never would've..." she nodded, making a soft sound of acknowledgement.
"I know, I forgive you. And I am sorry that I hit you." Finally, he turned around and saw her standing there, dressed in deep red clothes and looking shy and unsure, as if she still didn't know what to make of him. Her dark eyes found his split lip, and she touched it gently with her soft fingertips, forcing herself not to kiss him.
"I'm sorry," she whispered again. He grinned.
"Don't be; I think that the scar will make me look kind of cool." The shadow veiling her features seemed to lift, and she laughed.
"So we are okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," he pulled her into a hug and rested his chin on her head. "I think we'll be alright now."
"I was just leaving-"
"I know," Halling said gravely. "But she needs you here tonight." he glanced sadly past him at their sleeping friend, his forehead lined with concern. A second later he returned his gaze to Sheppard. "As long as you promise not to-"
"What? No, never!" he promised. He would never do anything like Halling was thinking; especially not to Teyla. "I'll sleep across the door." the smallest hint of a smile chased across Halling's face.
"I believe that she will appreciate that." He sounded almost amused, and John couldn't begin to guess why. But the man gave him no clue; he merely bowed his head and bid him goodnight, and left the tent.
-----------
It had been one of the hardest days of John Sheppard's life. He hated to say it--- because as long as Teyla was happy, it should have been enough--- but seeing her happy with someone else that was killing him.
The day had started off normail enough; they'd gone on a routine mission to a new world; and the second that they'd stepped through the gate everyone reacted exactly as they should have,
McKay had taken only a second to pause and cautiously sniff the planet's air before spouting off his habitual litany of complaints that he seemed certain the team could not live without. Ronon--- as his runner's instincts demanded--- was on instant alert, wary of danger. And Teyla had paused and looked around, studying everything with abalanced mixture of caution and anticipation. He appreciated her perspective.
"Alright!" Sheppard cut McKay off. "The database didn't have a whole lot of information on this planet; but it said that the people are kinda skittish. So we're gonna be nice and calm and easy, alright?"
"Oh, nice and calm is my middle name!" Rodney said. John rolled his eyes.
"Just let me or Teyla do the talking, okay?" The insulted scientist immediately started to grumble, but John saw Teyla flash him an appreciative smile his way. He returned it, knowing that she liked that he trusted her; and that she secretly enjoyed saving him from making too mch of a fool out of himself. He loved that about her. Come to think of it, he loved everything about her.
He looked away before she could catch the look in his eyes. Yes they were friends, and they may have shared a kiss or two; but he knew that she didn't love him. They were friends, and would always remain simply friends. Best friends. but never anything more. He sighed, but started walking as if nothing was wrong; as if his heart wasn't breaking.
"You really should just tell her," Ronon murmured, coming up beside him. Sheppard frowned at him.
"Shut up!" he grumbled, stealing a quick glance at Teyla to make sure that she hadn't heard. But she was listening to something that McKay was saying, and didn't seem to have noticed.
"Seriously? What's so hard about three little words?" Sheppard fixed his eyes ahead, refusing to look at the Satedan.
"For one, even if you know that the feeling is mutual, those three little words are alwaysthe hardest ones to say. And also, this is..." he refused to look at her. "...you know who we're talking about. She's... herself, she's sweet, she's beautiful, she's..."
"Perfect?" Tonon supplied the word.
"Basically, yeah. And you don't just go and say that to a perfect person offhand like you want me to do. Besides, she'll feel bad and say what I want to hear, just so that I won't be upset."
"Have I ever told you how much of an idiot you are?" Ronon questioned.
"With increasing regularity." John shuddered. "Seriously, tell me what I have to do to get you off my case; get you pizza... beer... a thousand dead wraith?" Ronon didn't laugh, though he clearly wanted to.
"You either tell her..."
"Yeah, not happening."
"....or fight better." and a hand flew towards his head. He barely ducked out of the way in time.
"Knock it off!" he snapped. "What if we found a bunch of wraith and you were too busy whacking me to kill them?"
"Then your girlfriend would save us," Ronon muttered playfully.
"Ronon!" John wasn't in the mood for his friend's irritatingly persistent teasing.
"Now, boys..." Teyla cut in, John's raised voice giving her a reason to gently silence McKay's complaints. "Play nice."
"Oh, yes mother." John snapped crankily, instantly regretting taking his anger out on her. She raised an eyebrowat him.
"John..."
"Sorry. But don't yell at me; he started it!"
She turned to Ronon.
"Don't antagonize him, please. Our mission would pay for it now, and you will pay for it later."
"I'm sorry, mother," he mocked Sheppard's earlier comment, not looking sorry at all. But something in her eyes made him get serious again. Once he wiped that evil smirk off his face, Teyla turned to sedate McKay again. But her distraction only allowed Ronon to grin again and mouth something at Sheppard that he didn't bother to try and understand. Ignoring the Satedan, he focused his eyes ahead and thought that this was exactly how he knew that Teyla didn't love him the way that he loved her; she acted like their mother.
It wasn't long before they reached teh village, which fit the description in the database perfectly. The people were shy and skittish, but curious, trailing after the team like lost puppies.
Eventually, one of the bolder villagers--- who couldn't have been much older than twenty--- stepped up to them. Sheppard gave the teen what he hoped was a comforting, non-threatening smile.
"Hi," he said. To his surprise, the kid started to spout off what sounded like a lot of gibberish.
"What?" And the gibberish was repeated, no less understandable tan the first time.
"Teyla..." John began, turning in her direction to find her gone. He groaned.
"Where did she go?" he asked, not directing his question at anyone in particular.
"That way," Ronon gestured to their right. "Talking to... that guy." Sheppard followed his friend's pointing finger and saw Teyla, her forehead pressed to that of a tall and admittedly attractive--- by what John knew of women's standards--- man, and her arms wrapped tightly around his waist. Her back was almost completely turned to them, so he couldn't see her face; but something told him that she was crying.
He burned with jealousy.
"Excuse us for a minute..." he muttered to the confused teen, before heading towards his wayward team-mate. As he got closer, he heard her quite voice even above the noise of the crowd.
"...I can't believe it's really you..." Really who? Who WAS this guy that was hugging and holding the woman that he loved as if there was no one else in the world?
"Want to introduce us?" he questioned, with the minimum amount of respect required for speaking to Teyla. She jerked around, running a hand quickly under her eyes to hide the wetness. Yup. Definitely crying. Who was this guy that she loved him enough for the mere sight of him to make her cry? John's anger grew. She had never cried for him before.
"I'm sorry. Tayzon, this is my team..." she pointed to each of them as she said their names. Then she introduced them to her friend. "This is Tayzon Anachi."
"Hi," McKay said distrately. Ronon just grunted, but seemed to approve of her closeness tothe man.
"Pleasure," John lied; this was anything but. Teyla raised an eyebrow a his tone, but chose to ignore it.
"Tayzon is a very dear friend of mine," she explained to them. "But he was taken many years ago. I did not know that he had survived."
"I almost didn't," he admitted. "I would not have, of I had not intrigued the queen enough for her to let me live."
"How?" Ronon asked, interested.
"She found me... similar? to her people."
"How?" John asked, biting ff a comment about being an absolute low-life for abandoning his people. And he only managed to do that for Teyla's sake.
"He has my gift," Teyla explained, running her hand gentlyup the man's arm without seeming to realize it. "And I think that he learned to use it before I did. He used to hear the wraith speak." John's mind barely registered that; all he could focus on was her physical closeness to Tayzon.
"I was able to tell the queen everyting that her followers were thinking; and it made me unusual and useful as a spy against them, and especially against other hives. It was enough of a reason for her to keep me alive until I could escape."
"So what does that make you; a wraith worshipper?" John asked. This time Teyla's look could have killed him; but Tayzon seemed mildly annoyed, at the most.
"I pretended what I had to in order to survive; but I swear that I do not work for them now." He noticed Teyla's rage, and put a soothing hand on her arm. "It's alright, Shona. I would worry as well." She relaxed somewhat, but John had a feeling that it was merely so that she wouldn't make a scene in the middle of the village square. He was certain that he would hear about this later.
"When you did escape--- which I want to know how you did, by the way---why didn't you go back to Athos?" Tayzon smiled sadly at Rodney's question.
"I did," he said. "But all that I found was evidence of a culling."
"Ah." Rodney didn't say anything else; he knew as well as anyone else that John had caused the culling.
Things all went downhill from there. John had somehow been conned into bringing Tayzon back to Atlantis, and later to the mainland. Well, that wasn't completely true. He'd done it because Teyla had asked him to. He couldn't refuse her anything. But he was wishing that he had, because Tayzon was driving him crazy.
They'd introduced him to Elizabeth, and he'd given her the same sob story that he'd shared on the planet. John was sick of it. Elizabeth may have bough it, but he didn't. There was definitely something wrong about that guy. The way he kept looking at Teyla, their... physical closeness. Every time that they were near enough, she was in his arms, or he had his hand on her arm, or something.
Yes, he was jealous, he admitted. But it was righteous jealousy; he didn't want Teyla to end up with this guy who had abandoned her years ago. And it bothered him that she was welcoming him back with opened arms so quickly.
Tayzon had been given a full security and medical check, and soon after they had left for the mainland, where Sheppard had spent hours being ignored as the Athosians welcomed back their long lost kinsman. He wanted to throw up.
In honor of Tayzon's return, a feast had been prepared, but John barely tasted any of it. He couldn't take his eyes off of Teyla... who couldn't take her eyes off of Tayzon. He hated it.
Things had continued in much the same fashion for most of the night. But it was late now, and some of the Athosians were finally starting to drift off to bed. Sheppard. And Ronon and Rodney--- who had all gotten permission to stay the night--- were sitting alone by a fire, the Satedan and the scientist driving each other crazy. John was staring sulkily off towards a different fire; were Teyla sat with Tayzon and Halling, deep in conversation.
He saw them glance in his direction once, and a question seemed to pass between the three, before they looked away again. John bit back a moan.
"Hey," Ronon shoved him off-balance, diverting his attention. "You can at least pretend that you're happy for her." John frowned at him darkly.
"Aren't you the one who's always telling me that I'm in love with her?" he asked creankily. "Why would I be happy to see her with another guy?" Ronon's eyes widened.
"Are you serious?" he started to laugh; a sound that they rarely heard from him, which made eit that much more infuriation.
"What?" John snapped. Ronon just shook his head and laughed some more.
"I'm gonna let you figure this one out on your own, Sheppard." Still laughing, he got up and walked away in search of a late-night snack.
After a moment, Johnn realized that Rodney was sitting there, staring at him.
"What?"
"Is that seriously what you're upset about; you're worried that Tayzon is going to steal her from you?"
"Wouldn't you be?" It was a lame defense and he knew it. But he was running out of good ones.
"He can't steal her from you if you haven't claimed her," McKay informed him. "And you haven't. She has no idea that you love her."
"Oh, so the insightful McKay returns!" he spat sarcastically. "Why is it that yu only get that way when you want me to do something stupid?" ROdney frowned, insulted.
"The only stupid thing that you could do would be to do nothing," he informed him, before heading after Ronon and leaving John alone by the fire.
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The next morning dawned bright and warm, but John was unable to enjoy it. For one thing, he was still there. And that aside, Halling had put him to work.
He had agreed because he'd thought that it would get him away from Tayzon. No such luck. For once, he and Teyla were not joined at the hip; instead, the man had the nerve to follow him around! John threw himself into the tasks that he'd been given, hoping to distract himself from Tayzon's presence. It didn't work.
Around four o'clock in the afternoon, something snapped. It may have been the lack of Teyla's presence to make him behave, or it may have just been the heat of the day. But regardless of the reason, he lost control.
"What are you trying to do to me?" he demanded, dropping the tool that he'd been trying to fix and whirling on Tayzon. "And not just the whole following me around thing, either--- which is incredibly annoying, by the way--- but what are you trying to do to Teyla?!" Tayzon looked shocked.
"Excuse me?"
"You're practically throwing yourself at her; you're trying to take her away from us. But where have you been for the past few years, huh? You couldn't have survived on the hive for that long!"
"I tried-"
"And regardless of where you HAVE been, the point is that Teyla deserves better than someone who deserted her." As with Ronon the night before, Tayzon's eyes opened wide, and he laughed disbelievingly. Unlike Ronon, it was clear that he did not find any of this funny.
"That's what you think.. didn't she tell you anything?!" Sheppard was confused, but he channeled all that confusion into the desire to hit Tayzon as hard as he could. He watched with satisfaction as the man reeled back. But a cry shattered his victory.
"JOHN!" he cringed; she had seen what he'd done. He was dead.
To his surprise, she stormed past him and over to Tayzon, wrapping her arms around him and comforting HIM, the imposter! And somehow her total disregard for John standing there just made everything worse.
"What, you can't even get mad at me now?" she ignored his rant, so he continued as she herded Tayzon back towards the settlement. "What are you going to do now? Tale him back to your tent for a couple of hours like you did last night?" Teyla's head whipped around. "Comfort your boyfriend a little 'cuz he can't take a hit?!"
"How dare you even suggest-"
"Don't tell me that I'm wrong; I saw you take him into your tent last night!" Teyla's eyes were flaming with rage.
"You really have no idea who he even is, do you?"
"Bunkmate?" he bit out sarcastically, never even seeing her punches coming. In an instant, he was doubled over and tasting blood from a split lip.
"If you ever speak that way again..." but she was too angry to even finish. She turned away and returned with Tayzon to the settlement, leaving John alone. He watched until they were out of sight, then stormed through the village to the jumper. He refused to say a word to anyone, or even find Ronon and Rodney. He closed the hatch and relaxed in the pilot's seat. Not until the mainland was well out of sight did he radio Atlantis to send a jumper for the two.
"What about Teyla?" Elizabeth asked.
"I don't care if she comes back or not!" he told her. "As long as Tayzon isn't with her."
He reached the city in record time, parked the jumper, and immediately set off at a run towards one of the still deserted parts of the city, unable to be near anyone right now.
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John watched the sky darken into dusk. He let the cool breeze wash over him and tried not to think. There would be feelings that came with those thoughts, and the last thing he wanted was to feel.
No one bothered im while he was out there. He knew that no one knew what was going on with him, but they had talked to him while he was flying back and they knew that he was in a bad mood. No one wanted to get on his bad side.
He stood there for about an hour in the gathering dark, seething, knowing that no one would disturb him. Which was why he was startled when suddenly he heard her voice behind him.
"It is a long way back to the tower," he jumped at her soft voice, but didn't turn around.
"How'd you find me, then?"
"Because I know you, John Sheppard." For a long moment after that, they were silent. He heard her sigh. "You were wrong, John."
"I know!" he shouted. She sucked in a startled gasped, and he softened. "I know," he said again, very quietly. "I never should have said that you were sleeping with him; that's none of my business, you can do what you want-"
"John," she cut him off softly. "Tayzon is not my lover." John blinked, for a moment speechless.
"He's not?" he asked numbly.
"Do you remember how I introduced him?" she asked. He nodded slowly.
"Tayzon Anachi."
"Anachi is not his name," she explained. "It is an Athosian word that means brother." John swallowed hard.
"He's your brother?" he repeated, as suddenly all of the looks and gentle touching made sense as he realized it had not been done inappropriately.
"My cousin," she said. "But as close as a brother. I have much the same relationship with him that I do with Halling. They are my protectors." She paused, and John remembered an Athosian custom that he had heard of where a girl's closest friends were chosen to act like her brothers, if she had none. That must have been what had happened with Tayzon and Halling. He burned with shame to think of what he'd been suggesting. Now he knew why Ronon had been laughing at him.
"Last night," Teyla continued, "he slept at my door; like you did on... Easter. He did nothing wrong."
"I didn't know..." she sighed tiredly.
"So I gathered when you accused him. I had not realized that you did not know who he was to me."
"I'm sorry, Teyla. If I'd known, I never would've..." she nodded, making a soft sound of acknowledgement.
"I know, I forgive you. And I am sorry that I hit you." Finally, he turned around and saw her standing there, dressed in deep red clothes and looking shy and unsure, as if she still didn't know what to make of him. Her dark eyes found his split lip, and she touched it gently with her soft fingertips, forcing herself not to kiss him.
"I'm sorry," she whispered again. He grinned.
"Don't be; I think that the scar will make me look kind of cool." The shadow veiling her features seemed to lift, and she laughed.
"So we are okay?" she asked.
"Yeah," he pulled her into a hug and rested his chin on her head. "I think we'll be alright now."